Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
