Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize