I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
