It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
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