the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
