yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Vodka?
Forever.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
