porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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