he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
