Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Someone stole a lamp last night.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
