Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
