I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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