Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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