I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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