How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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