I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Randomize
