oh god the rape fog is back!
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
