Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Randomize
