i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize