It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize