her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
