we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
