so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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