I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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