Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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