and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize