I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize