ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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