I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
