There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
