She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
