oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
