You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize