That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize