Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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