You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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