what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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