If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize