yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
