shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
