HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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