Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
