I got chris browned last night
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
