Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
