she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize