just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
