Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
