the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize