Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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