oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
