Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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