ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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